The Resident OddParents, pt 1
by rocksfall1
Summary: When Vicky banishes Timmy to his room, he and his fairy godparents decide to take a day trip into outer space. They soon stumble upon what seems to be an abandoned space station. But as they explore its corridors, they soon discover they are not alone...


Pete Richard

1-12-09

Disclaimer: I do not own _The Fairly Oddparents_ nor do I own _Resident Evil_, therefore I do not claim ownership of any characters, dialogue, etc. therein. In addition, I am not making any kind of monetary profit from this story.

If anyone reading this is unfamiliar with either story, I recommend these videos to get you in the mood, so to speak, for this particular story. The first is the _OddParents_ pilot, and the second is a very very very condensed version of the first _Resident Evil_ movie. The links are: .com/watch?v=CHTb1cTQS_o&feature=related

.com/watch?v=CKrtg4bIUVk

_The Resident OddParents, pt. 1_

"Now get in your room and DON'T COME OUT!" Vicki screamed. Unfortunately for Timmy, his rather naive parents had once again left him in the care of Vicki, the most evil babysitter in the entire world. Timmy despised her because she delighted in nothing more than tormenting him whenever he fell into her clutches. Despite his ill feelings towards Vicky, Timmy did not mind her visits so much because it meant that he would be able to spend time with his fairy godparents.

"What do you want to do today, sport?" asked Wanda from the fishbowl where she and Cosmo had taken up residence. She was currently in the form of a goldfish, a disguise she and her husband often took in order to remain incognito. Fortunately for them, no one ever paid much attention to the fish in the bowl. If someone were to look close enough, they would notice that Timmy's fish wore miniature crowns, as well as the fact that Wanda's eyes were pink and Cosmo's green.

"Ooh, ooh, I know!" Cosmo interjected, swimming excitedly around the fake castle at the bottom of his aquatic home. "Let's go to dinosaur times!" he suggested. As if to illustrate his proposal, he disappeared from the fishbowl briefly and materialized in Timmy's room as a large green tyrannosaurus.

"Eh, we did that last week," Timmy said indifferently.

"Let's see, we could…look for buried treasure with the dreaded Blackbeard the pirate!" Wanda offered. Following Cosmo's example, she disappeared and then reappeared in the space above Timmy's head as a pirate. She was dressed in full pirate attire, complete with tri-corner hat, beard, parrot, cutlass, eye patch, and peg leg, all pink, and hovered there on her delicate fairy wings.

Again Timmy rejected the idea, citing a past incident in which he had almost been forced to walk the plank into shark-infested waters, before being rescued by his fairies. He lapsed into deep thought, before exclaiming, "I know! Let's go to the Moon!"

"Alright!" cheered the fairies enthusiastically. It had been some time since they had ventured into outer space, and they were aching to go. But now came one of their favorite parts of being a fairy: granting wishes.

"I wish for a rocket ship!" Timmy said in as commanding a voice as his pre-pubescent vocal chords would allow. The stars on the ends of his fairies' wands flashed brilliantly as they waved them. Out of nowhere, a large silver rocket ship materialized at the foot of Timmy's bed in a puff of magical smoke. As it did, the two fairies poofed Timmy into the cockpit dressed in a very stylish spacesuit and then became two green and pink knobs on the front of the suit. As a precaution, the couple preferred to remain close to their ward at all times. This was because unforeseen circumstances often arose, and a well-timed wish could mean the difference between life and death.

Timmy fired up the rocket's engines and the sleek futuristic machine took off, destroying a large section of the roof, and scorching most of Timmy's room. The force of the rocket lifting off shook the whole house, disturbing Vicky while she watched the latest Chip Skylark music video on the television.

"Turner, you little twerp!" Vicky screeched as she stomped up the stairs to chastise Timmy for breaking her no-noise-whatsoever rule. She kicked open the door to his bedroom and stepped into the charred remains ready to chew him out when she saw what the rocket had done to the room. All she could do was stand and stare, mouth agape, at the enormous hole in the roof. _The Turners are going to kill me_, she thought miserably.

Meanwhile, aboard the rocket, Wanda and Timmy were greatly enjoying the effects of zero-gravity by throwing a green dodge ball (which happened to be Cosmo) at each other and bouncing around the hull of the ship to dodge the projectile. Wanda had Timmy in her sights and was about to hurl a wicked fastball, when an alarm went off in the ship. The three looked around startled, and Wanda quickly waved her wand to poof them into the cockpit. Timmy materialized in the captain's seat with his fairies on the consoles on either side of him, wearing their own green and pink spacesuits. He looked down at the ship's radar and noticed that their rocket was fast approaching a small space station. As they approached the station, Timmy noticed that a large red-and-white-striped pinwheel symbol was painted on the hull of the station.

"I'll try radioing them," Wanda suggested. "This is FAIRY 1, come in. This is FAIRY 1, come in." No response. Wanda repeated the message several more times before giving up.

"Hey look, I'm like a Cosmonaut!" said Cosmo inanely, earning a glare of reproach from Wanda. "Oh, I mean, maybe their radio is broken. Let's go see if anyone's home!" Before Timmy or Wanda could react, Cosmo had grabbed the ship's steering wheel and jerked it to the right, throwing the other two off their chairs and into a heap on the other side of the room. Miraculously, he executed the maneuver without damaging anything. As Timmy and Wanda were recovering from their near-heart attacks, Cosmo dashed out of the cockpit excitedly on his little fairy wings to the rocket's loading hatch and entered the station.

Timmy and Wanda entered soon after and immediately felt that something was amiss aboard the station. The air was far too still and they heard no sounds of activity, save for Cosmo tramping around in search of the crew members. They walked further and further into the station, looking for signs of the crew, but found none. Timmy was beginning to consider the possibility that the station was just brand new and the crew had not arrived yet when he and Wanda walked into the mess hall.

The room looked as if everyone had just simply vanished. There were glasses still half-filled with liquid, plates with food sitting on them, spoons left in bowls of cold soup.

"Where did everybody go?" Timmy asked.

"Well, it doesn't look like they've been gone long, since there's no dust on the tables," said Wanda, flying over one to inspect its surface.

"I wondered what happened. It looks like they all just left."

"I've got a bad feeling about this, Timmy. We should get Cosmo and go."

"Speaking of Cosmo," Timmy wondered, "where is he?"

At that moment, Cosmo materialized next to the pair and began to talk rapidly.

"Ooh, ooh, ooh, guess what guess what! I found someone! He was wandering around all alone in the space station and I thought I would introduce him to you guys so he could have some company, and oh, here he comes now!"

A figure came slowly shuffling around a corner and looked around briefly before spotting the trio and moaning as it turned to shuffle towards them. There were sores all over its body and its skin was the color of dead fish. As the creature drew nearer, Timmy and Wanda could see that the figure was a human male. Clipped to the man's dirty white jumpsuit was a name tag stamped with that same strange pinwheel symbol next to the name "Stanley".

"Oh he'll be so glad to meet you! Come on Stanley, come here boy!" Cosmo beckoned.

_Something is definitely weird about Stanley_, thought Timmy. When he finally reached the trio, Stanley brushed past Cosmo and Wanda as if he could not see them and locked his gaze on Timmy. Stanley reached down and picked him up gently, slowly bringing the boy closer to his chest in an embrace.

"Aww, he likes you!" cooed Cosmo.

Timmy quickly realized this was not the case, as Stanley appeared to be trying to take a large bite out of his neck. He pushed against Stanley's cold, clammy face as hard as he could, keeping the attacking human's mouth away from his body, but he knew that his underdeveloped muscles could not handle the strain for long.

"No Stanley! Bad! Bad Stanley!" Cosmo scolded to no effect.

"Oh for the love," said Wanda, exasperated. Waving her wand, she turned her inept husband into a green baseball bat. She grabbed Cosmo, wound up, and swung with all her might at Stanley's head, sending him reeling and causing him to drop Timmy to the floor. Before he even hit the floor, Timmy was struck with a realization.

"Cosmo wait, that's a zombie!" he exclaimed.

"Look, I know you two got off to a rocky start, but that's no reason to call poor Stanley names," said Cosmo defensively.

"No, really! Think about it, he tried to eat me, he looks dead, and smells dead!"

"That must be what happened to the rest of the crew then," added Wanda. "Either way, we should probably leave before more of them find us."

"Well I don't care what you say about him. You're just jealous of us!" said Cosmo resolutely.

"Cosmo, let the zombie go. We can't take him with us," intoned Wanda.

"B-b-but w-why?" asked Cosmo bewildered, his eyes brimming over with tears.

As he said this, Wanda's Cosmo-is-going-to-make-Timmy-dead sense began tingling. She was about to put her foot down on the idea, when they all heard moaning coming from all parts of the station.

"Uh guys," said Timmy interrupting the drama. "I think we should go back now."

The trio looked down the corridor to see a large group of zombies turning a corner and ambling towards them, moaning. The three of them took off in the opposite direction with Timmy and Wanda in front and Cosmo trailing behind, all the while dragging Stanley by the collar. Right as they were about to reach the docking bay, another group of zombies stepped out to block their path and begin shuffling towards them. With zombies in front and behind them, the group was trapped in the corridor.

"Wanda, what do we do?" asked Timmy tensely.

"Wish for something!"

"I wish we were back on the ship!"

Cosmo and Wanda's wands lit up as they were transported back onto the rocket. When they materialized in the cockpit, Timmy once more found Stanley trying to eat him. He managed to squirm from the zombie's grip and wished for Stanley to have a muzzle and be tied up.

Cosmo and Wanda waved their wands and the restraints appeared on Stanley, who lost balance and fell to the floor. Cosmo looked upset about having to chain up his newfound pet, but Timmy did not want to have to deal with a zombie trying to eat him at the moment. He and his fairies had already been gone far longer than they had originally intended, and Timmy's parents would be home soon.

He guessed that the rocket had probably wrecked much of the house during liftoff. The damage could easily be wished away, but there was still the problem of having to land the ship. If his parents saw him land a rocket ship in their backyard, they would undoubtedly deduce the cause of the damage. And if that happened, there would be no way for him to blame it on Vicky.

"Wait, Timmy," exclaimed Wanda. "We can't just bring a zombie back to your house!"

"There's no time to put him back in the station, my parents are going to be home in a few minutes! We'll just hide him in my closet and in a few days we'll take him back," Timmy proposed.

"Umm, I don't thi-"

"YAY! We're keeping him!" exclaimed Cosmo, throwing his arms around Stanley's neck.

Timmy was about to correct Cosmo, but Wanda advised him to just forget it for now. As he flew the ship out of the station's docking bay, Timmy set a course for Dimmsdale, hoping he would make it back in time. At the same time, he was wondering how the heck he was going to keep Stanley a secret from his parents.

_To Be Continued…_

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